Make your passion outweigh your anxiety

You have to do your breathing techniques just outside of the mic area so then you're not breathing on the mic or breathe below the mic if you did it like this then maybe I just need to mute it yeah well every time welcome back I have decided not to put the mic right in front of my mouth this time and hopefully we've got the best quality that you'll ever see and hear at the same time because both Tom and I.

Um of just helping people and I think exercising that through um I think I've tried to do it in various ways of like mentoring or serving like helping out at different volunteer stuff I can never quite get the right amount of um scratch to my itch let's just say that um it's always either I'm over committing or overdoing it or I'm guessing burnt out and bored but I think the last couple of weeks I'm sort of trying to.

Um what does freedom look like for him so he's someone in his hopefully he's not listening because I don't know his age in his 50s so and he feels like he's still got a lot to give um he's in yeah I won't bother saying industry so but he's in the business World anyway um he's um middle management by the sounds of it um so not like CEO level but not like working on the ground so like in between.

Right or not even communicating about the redundancies it's communicating that you're safe in your role because if there's redundancies or not that's to some extent irrelevant it's more the the safety element of you are safe if anything happened you're on the right side to be on um obviously there's a sadness of if let's say you're letting go your friends and that type of stuff but assume that you're not letting go of your friends the redundancy doesn't matter it's more.

To do this I always regardless of how much experience how good energy I've got or bad energy I always have this social anxiety straight before it slash nervousness of light I don't want to do this at all um why am I doing this I and I guess the um the thought that I won't be impactful so it's really good to I guess walk through that um to build your confidence back up not not like you'll ever get confidence but.

Working with a charity slash Church in the local area um so I've helped them out so they're in a transitional period so um leaders new leadership again put into place in the next I think it was 18 months about six months ago so I think they're in their last year now or so um roughly and it's fascinating because basically the people that are taken on don't know where the church is financially this this charity so they rent out a lot of their rooms.

Business charity Church whatever you always need to put your stint on it you can't mimic what other people have done so it's interesting I was listening to a podcast of um I've literally blanked out his name David Moy is stepping into Salix Ferguson's shoes basically at man united all I was going to do is basically just not touch anything because it's a system that works why would I change it but now in his maturity looking back what eight.

I got them to look at their budget what's the income outgoings and in that process um we've not finished the whole process um so they're still writing it down because I've I've tried to take a more digital there is physical at the moment so it takes time and obviously they're busy with loads of stuff so it's a long transition but during that time they've recognized that they've got one major I guess client um that rents out a lot of their office.

Community how can we work with them by negotiating of if you can have those two Extra Spaces is that enough because they're outgrowing the space that they had so in the meantime so I've chatted with them and it's really interesting to find out that is the case and they've signed a lease and got more money for it so not only that they've secured a 18-month lease so it gives a bit more of a runway for that transition of.

That can't afford the gym or struggling to eat healthy like to tackle people's finances like actually there's a lot of support out there for people that are um homeless or in supported homes but now it's attacking that they're sort of you got the rich and then you got homeless and then like the Gap in between that that they're getting sort of hacked at the most so it's sort of creating space for them I guess just to be their best selves.

Import I've wandered away I've come back I've had a bit of a break over Christmas re-jumping into right let's kick on and seeing a massive shift in both of those areas is really engaging and exciting to see that oh you do have something to bring to the table and that's like just a passion that's like I think the passion is outweighing the the stress or the anxiety or the worry of what that might look like which is um.

They needed your help so it really challenged me on um who do I want to help out with because actually going I want to help out the homeless well what if they don't want to be helped maybe they like the fact that they're living out of a tent because they don't want to pay council tax because that stresses them out the thought of paying 140 pounds a month or whatever council tax for money that they don't have so it's really interesting again.

Right on Zoom is is like a notch of barrier for you to stop yourself from doing it it's like cool let's just go back to basics let's just have a phone call let's aim to have a because I think the first chat was actually let's aim to have a 30 minute chat like super low bar we end up chatting for an hour and a half and that's the thing it's like even fleshing out different ideas with with that church charity it's like I've.

I could listen to your voice note different times of his week to process what I was trying to say and to think about how he can input so it's really interesting going actually your um I guess giving permission I was going to say Authority but I guess Authority as well but permission for people to voice note you because maybe that might be their way of doing it but they're used to sending emails and text and and so on.

The differences I I think for me I've always saw my saw myself as a mentor because it's easier to use my own experience um to kind of help someone rather than a coach which will typically uh we'll use experience but might give you like some mental um kind of like model or something to use um and they might not have necessarily been in the same industry or or kind of like mimicked what you've got in an experience wise so I think it's really.

Thought about this or have you thought about simplifying or whatever it is to then have go away process it and then to have a second conversation that's like yeah that's really helped me I'm like I'm now over here and I think for the times that I've done mentoring sessions I I I've also done like hey free mentoring sessions and literally after two sessions you've you've kind of like given the next kind of like bit of energy to carry on the race right.

Fascinating like knowing who your audience is is fascinating it's good that you're allowed to prototype and experiment and try um because you've had plenty of experience in the past doing it so it's good to like carry on prototyping and trying things and seeing if things fit yes or no I think um reflecting on stuff that's happened for us this week we've had a really good conversation so you may might remember back when um when I was saying about there's a pub in.

Tom and I were on the conversation when we're like ideas people we're not there to implement it but they were like oh yeah we'd love ideas because we're not business orientated but we're on the ground so it was really really cool that conversation just again to like unblock and what they've been doing is they really want to buy a property um because that's kind of like a really good investment a long-term kind of put a stamp and I was like at the property.

Something and also driving to action so having a conversation with somebody to be like hey why why bother trying to find the perfect thing like a a bad deal is better than no deal and just that perspective right so really enjoyed having that conversation because basically it was creatives talking with creatives which is good fun and I thought that was really really good but all it needs is that one conversation right like the other conversations we had was with a couple.

Um but sometimes when there's um I guess expectations of what's going to come out of a conversation and whatever and just understanding context so for example you you know that we're working on a product called Insider which is a music uh streaming platform which is basically a Spotify meets patreon type approach to give independent music artists more um kind of control over their own income and better sustainability options for their income as well over typically just streaming on.

A salary to pay and my own bills to pay so I find sometimes you just need one conversation but you need like the right kind of conversation with the right questions the right understanding of context and the right understanding of like what's going to be plausible for you so I think it's a case of like really making sure that you find people that understand your situation um and the Italian stuff that's plausible although I do agree on reflection of the conversation I'm like.

Next Step which is still a big step but it's not like go go to zero you know so I think it's like it's really helpful to have there's one conversations to have those context pieces to give you the right advice and sometimes it only needs one composition or two conversations just like unlock your brain just to get you to the next level right so yeah it's a very interesting one and I think it's sometimes you just gotta trash your gut I think annoyingly School.

Actually Ai and VI is um VR and AI that kick-offs unless you can transmit the early stages of the internet and transmit it elsewhere because actually if someone's like well I made Google and then it's booming let's say well if you make Google Now like or whatever you wouldn't be able to compete cause you'd have to do way more work it's like that have you ever seen that bell curve at all like the the young adopters the basically the main flock of.

You've ever done before which is not a bad thing yeah I have found just even though sorry just even the principle of talking to people I just talk to new people as a good principle to start yeah carry on yeah and I think it is it's liberating you and this might not necessarily be everyone it might be just people with more less confidence or more anxiety um maybe that's what the people that I'm speaking to right now but by going actually you might have the.

List but as long as you've chosen for those items to be on your budget list I'm okay with it so if you've got let's say YouTube premium on there I don't mind that you're paying 10 20 quid towards YouTube premium but if it's sitting on there because you signed up for it five years ago and you're not interested in it at all either make the most of that money or delegate it because actually you can invest it in stocks or you can put it.

Said better than how I said it you could either be your what was it you could either be yourself or a bad copy of someone else or something along the lines of that and I think it is that in those I guess life is a bit like poker you've got your own cards you know what you're holding sometimes you can share but you recognize actually everyone's got their own cards that they might give you advice based off their cards or your.

To meet up with people and they'll say oh yeah this is the thing you're missing um so sometimes I've had conversations because like this is the piece of business advice or business Insight that you're missing but then you realize actually you're not missing anything it's just you have to keep going you have to keep going for 10 years 12 years 15 years or whatever it is yeah so over over time I've started to readjust to actually be like you know what I'm happy.

A bunch of like insights a bunch of one line there's a bunch of tweetable like things that can be said or like earth-shattering moments and sometimes it actually doesn't end up being like that so yeah is it a case of readjusting I think for me I'm at the stage where I'm basically speaking to people less in the sense of somebody's got an answer that I'm missing and just trusting my my gut a little bit more that I am doing the.

Than a society typically is the loudest noise which is like you should be doing more it should be more impactful you should be a nice person like actually maybe it's about doing less you know and yeah focusing on like a smaller holding rather than the big holding that you have and then other times it might be that you're actually getting wanting external validation there's this external answer you're waiting for somebody to give you this uh Golden Nugget of information or the next step.

Perceptive enough to be able to glean that of somebody and then you know bounce off them and reflect it because typically we we know how therapy works the therapist doesn't give you the answer you come up with the answer right over time and you're helped to come up with the answer and I believe that that's it like were helped to come up with the answer when we're told the right things for example when I say do less rather than do more.

Newsletter called the bottom line we want to give two points so as you know Tom and I uh like two different sides Yin and Yan is the white hoodie slash gray hoodie and the black T-shirt over here um Thomas the saving money um cutting cutting outgoings type approach and I'm going to cutting corners and not not cutting Corners well if it means that you save money um cutting Corners approach and then I'm the making business growth um kind of like big picture type stuff.

Have enough subscribers we'll actually start putting it together and start sending it out because again prototype prototype don't over stretch so wait until you actually signed up yeah so if you sign up get in the hype you'll get you'll get um the bottom line sent your inbox every week and then the second thing is yeah as Tom was saying like we're open to have conversations hopefully by now you kind of know that we're not douchebags well maybe and we're kind of nice people.

The form is up oh I stand corrected so we have one Jing ice because I thought the four might not be um yeah here we do have one jingle oh technically two if you class my tester to make sure the form worked but I deleted that one okay so you're you're in um you're in the game then if you've entered yourself as the the jingler so we've only got actually January I think we've only got one week left right.

Merch that people might want but I think that's March isn't it merch merch March yeah maybe merch March can be like design um design like a don't be a doorstop uh coaster or Mouse model or t-shirt actually it'd be cool to do a t-shirt because at least then it could be more sustainable because you will actually end up wearing a t-shirt rather than a coaster or a mouse map or whatever so yeah and also if this is the second video.

Keep I was gonna say jingle those keys but then I was like that'll probably make no sense but jingle those Nails keep hammering those Nails bye for now.